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Every tear that I have ever cried has been for you.

Every desire I have ever felt has been for you.

I have never been looking for anything or anyone other than you.

 

And now I see that you are here.

 

You have always been here as the very essence of my Being.

All the times I have cried out you were there

Listening to my every breath, my every word, my every thought.

Your holy presence, your openness has always been

The vastness at my core.

 

You are a tenderness and beauty that I cannot escape.

I cannot deny that you are what I AM.

 

These eyes are already your eyes.

These ears are already your ears.

I am shattered by the realization that I am already

The Beloved that I desire and it has always been this way.

 

My longing for you has obliterated every other desire.

I see nothing else but you.

 

You are coursing through my veins.

You are filling up my lungs.

You are the burning in my chest.

Your presence is the presence of all things.

 

In every moment I am submerged in your grace.

You fill and surround me in joy.

This Beingness is permanent, unchanging, pristine and pure.

The light of creation–you are what has always sustained and animated me.

Every moment is a dynamic reflection of your still and immoveable heart.

 

I am walking in the infinite rooms of your body.

You have opened every door to me.

I am yours and you are mine.

We are and have always been one.

 

The only relief I have from this love is to write about it.

And writing has become a physical need.

 

This intimacy is breaking me.

Concepts and images cannot survive in this light.

It’s as though my identity was a cloth held up to the sun.

The light is dissolving the fibers that have obstructed it.

 

I want nothing but to submit to this light, to magnify it and to serve it.

 

You ask nothing of me but to be that which I am, which is you.

You ask me not to turn away from your gaze, which is within all eyes.

You ask me to look only towards you and you are everywhere.

 

Make me a vessel of your light

A vessel of your holy Being from which you can drink of your Self.

 

Silence is the expression of this intimacy, this nearer than near-ness.

 

The personal sense of self is a garment between us.

Please remove it.

 

Approaching the end of this dusty road of separation–I am dancing to my death.

I have nothing. I am nothing.

And yet, I am everything because you have dawned within me.

 

I am dissolving in you.

I have departed from the shore of myself and am now a cell in your cosmic body.

 

Everywhere my eyes fall I am worshipping you.

Everywhere my hands rest I am worshipping you.

My Being aches for you and yet, you are right here

This aching is a bliss, a longing and a consummation.

 

Everywhere I look I see you being worshipped by all things

By way of their simple Beingness.

You are being glorified by all of existence

Because you are existence itself.

 

How could I ever fear anything again?

I see that you, my Beloved, are what I am

And you are everything, everyone and everywhere.

How could I ever experience another want? You/I am here!

 

This life is now a giving away, a constant, ecstatic emptying.

 

© 2012 Bethany Webster